Italy vs. France at the 2006 World Cup Final

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lanun
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Joined: 04/01/2021

At some point in the game, a confused Zidane mistakes an unsuspecting Materazzi for the ball, head-butts him in the chest and is consequently red carded after the first ever instance of VAR in an official football match.

Zidane ended up coaching Real Madrid, Materazzi ended up coaching Chennaiyin FC.

Conclusion: head technique might boost your coaching carreer. Although professional sports are utterly uninteresting, so you might consider something else instead.

lanun
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Joined: 04/01/2021

I forgot the demo. They both seem to have been frozen in carbonite, probably pursuant to Article 5 of some Community Guidelines.

head_technique.jpg howto.jpg
andyprough
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Joined: 02/12/2015

We actually changed the Troll Lounge code of conduct in 2007 due to Zidane's zaney header. Prior to that, headbutting an opponent was perfectly legal in the troll lounge, and was often met with wild roars of applause from the thousands of Troll Lounge spectators.

lanun
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Joined: 04/01/2021

I see. I think the red card was most probably given because of the confusion, not the head-butt itself.

Confusing an opponent with the ball is highly disrespectful for the ball. Using the ball to confuse an opponent is of course the basic goal of the game, and hence perfectly acceptable, generally. Some Communities consider it disrespectful for the opponent, though, and ban it.

Maybe any kind of body gesture should be banned in the near future, for fear of creating confusion and, possibly, commotion. I'll soon submit a proposal for that purpose to the relevant sub-committee regional delegation of the competent branch. Remember, gestures can kill. Frozen people can harm no one.

andyprough
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Joined: 02/12/2015

> "Maybe any kind of body gesture should be banned in the near future, for fear of creating confusion and, possibly, commotion. I'll soon submit a proposal for that purpose to the relevant sub-committee regional delegation of the competent branch. Remember, gestures can kill. Frozen people can harm no one."

What if a player on one team stares at someone on the other team rudely? Or raises their eyebrow in a condescending manner?

What if one player refuses to look in the direction of another player? Won't even acknowledge their existence?

These forms of extreme violence could result in player injuries and even death...

lanun
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Joined: 04/01/2021

> stares at someone

Gesture of the eye: immediate freezing with no appeal.

> raises their eyebrow

Gesture of the eyebrow: eternal damnation in frozen Hell.

lanun
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Joined: 04/01/2021

We all knew it was only a matter of time. Now someone has almost been killed by a football.

dangerous.PNG
andyprough
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Joined: 02/12/2015

> "Nobile was given Ronaldo's shirt to make up for the accident and was pictured wearing it during the game."

Give a sports fan a sweaty, smelly shirt, and you can get away with anything, including attempted homicide.

lanun
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Joined: 04/01/2021

> and was pictured wearing it during the game.

So in fact, adding brazen laziness to unprovoked violence and doubtful personal hygiene, he got the injured person to play the match in his place. Get that freezing machine ready.

lanun
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Joined: 04/01/2021

> What if one player refuses to look in the direction of another player? Won't even acknowledge their existence?

Then the other player gets frozen, because obviously they tried and attract the attention of their opponent through some gesture, which would now be forbidden.

Simply walking on the pitch is tremendously gesticular in itself, when properly examined. All players should lay down, sit down or stand still until the final whistle is blown by the cane toad. Under no circumstances should the ball be kicked. No kicking around, ever. Maybe some smiling might still be allowed, but surely no grin. The referee's job will mostly consist of evaluating smiling vs. grin, with the help of VAR. Football will become an entirely new and fascinating sport. It shall simply be called "ball" or "stillball". It could ultimately be played entirely without an actual ball, in a remote future.

And thereby we shall bring peace and frost to the Galaxy.

panties
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Joined: 02/02/2021

What would you do if a fly invaded your house and buzzed around in front of the display you were looking at, buzzed around you when you were taking a shower, buzzed around your plate when you tried to eat, and kept buzzing around your head when you were sleeping?

panties
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Joined: 02/02/2021

Oh I posted in the wrong thread.